Researcher Christian Smith has said that today’s teeangers could be described as “moralistic, therapeutic deists.” They see Christianity as a set of moral principles. They believe religion is supposed to make you feel good about yourself. And they see God as distant and hard to know. We have taught kids that “True Love Waits” and to “Just Say No,” but we may have allowed them to miss the point.

Essential 2: Teach youth to see Christianity as a relationship with Jesus Christ.

I was in a Hindu temple in India once. The worshipers were banging and yelling as loudly as they could. A guide explained to me that they were trying to get the attention of their god. If only they had turned their attention to the God who is always present and ready to listen to them . . .

Teenagers desperately need to know that Christianity is a relationship.

1. Christianity is not a set of moral principles to live by. Yes, Christians are called to live holy lives. They are to reflect the holiness of their Father. However, an attempt to live a holy life without a close relationship to the Father is futile and worthless.

2. Christianity is not about getting what you want, as if God is a cosmic Santa Claus. It is about walking with the Father, learning to trust him, and knowing that he will work all things for the good of us because we love him.

3. Christianity is not about making God what we want him to be. It is about relating to him as he is. He does not wink at our sin. We don’t get to have an understanding with him on our own terms. He is the Holy God who loves us, but calls us to follow him closely.

How do we help teenagers to develop a close relationship with God? I suppose the most significant issue is how well we model Christianity as a real relationship with the Lord. Then, helping them to see that God desires for them to know him personally. He wants them to desire to spend time with them.

Why do I say these are essentials for youth ministry? The research for my doctorate asked 102 youth leaders from 27 different countries on 6 different continents what is essential for youth ministry. According to these youth leaders, seven things are essential. You will find other essentials on the SYG website.